So I woke up last Sunday to a lovely email from a gentleman from Match. I had checked out his profile the night before and was thinking about emailing, but he beat me to it. I emailed back and that was the start of a whirlwind week.
We spoke on the phone on Sunday afternoon… He seemed like a very nice guy. We had a great conversation. He was intelligent, witty, sweet… I learned he had a stable career and was a very involved dad. He had a lot going for him We agreed to meet the next evening for dinner. This was the quickest I have ever moved through ‘the process’. I guess I’m getting to the point now, that I don’t want to waste hours on emails and phone calls, only to meet and realize there’s no chemistry at all.
Monday comes and we meet at a casual restaurant for dinner. He is extremely warm in person… a big hug… touches my hand over appetizers… says all the right things. When we leave the restaurant and decide to go for coffee, he leans in for a kiss. A very pleasant kiss. He says he’s been wanting to do that since I walked into the restaurant. Another big hug and we’re off for coffee. He asks me out on two more dates… Friday and Saturday night. Okay, I think to myself, this guy is really interested! He made me feel… good… attractive, desirable… sexy. It was ‘almost’ too good to be true.
I wasn’t even home yet when I got his first text… ‘I miss you already’. Sighs… writing this now, I realize just how ridiculous this all sounds. I totally ignored the ‘too much, too soon’ warning bells going off in my head. I always wanted to be ‘swept off my feet’. I saw the broom coming and leaped right in its path. The week proceeded at a breakneck speed… more texts, phone calls, and requests for dinner dates. I had plans most of the week so had to politely decline, but changed my plans on Thursday so I could go out to dinner with Mr. Flash.
Another great date. Mr. Flash was charming, generous and totally attentive. The chemistry was still there and even kicked up a few notches. I was really looking forward to the weekend. Then Friday rolls around… I notice that there’s not as many phone calls or texts. But hey, I chalk it up to a busy day at work. We meet and head out to a concert. It’s at this point I start to sense something is ‘off’. He seems preoccupied. He puts the radio on, in what seems like an attempt, to avoid conversation. There are no compliments tonight. He’s still a bit touchy feely, but even that seems to be on the decline. After a kiss goodnight… I get a ‘see you tomorrow’ and Mr. Flash is gone.
The texts are now getting few and far between. No phone calls at all on Saturday. I wonder if we’re still going out. I finally text in the afternoon and ask. I word it in a way to allow him to get out of the date easily. I was rather surprised that he responded with an ‘of course we’re going out’. Okay, now I think to myself, I’m misreading him. I’m being too… too… too something. I decide to go with an open mind and fully intend to have some fun.
When we meet, there is no hello kiss, no hug. He barely talks to me… instead opts for talk radio. Actually, he barely looks at me. There is very little hand holding. I try my hardest to keep the conversation going, only to be faced with one word muttered responses. The game sucks, the conversation sucks… the date… sucks. I can’t wait to get home. But I’m starving at this point, so when he suggests we stop for something to eat, I open my mouth and say ‘yes’ before even thinking. UGH. Dinner was… painful. Thankfully we were seated near a bar so I could watch TV, because Mr. Flash spent most of dinner playing with his phone. Yes… You read that right… playing with his phone over dinner. By this time, I’m utterly disgusted and want to go home. At my car, there’s a peck good night and he mumbled something like ‘talk to you tomorrow’.
I cried all the way home. Not because Mr. Flash turned out to be Mr. Flop, but because of my own stupidity. I’m still wondering how someone can go from 0 to 90, back to 0 in under a week. Here’s the texts I got today:
Me: No response
Him: What are you doing?
That’s it folks. That’s all she wrote. Mr. Flash has now officially become… Mr. Flash in the Pan. And me? On one hand, I’m feeling pretty embarrassed, confused and stupid. On the other hand, I’m proud of myself. I put myself out there… I allowed myself to be vulnerable… I’m not sure if I was taken advantage of, or, just met someone that doesn’t really know what he wants. In any case, I’m going to pick myself up, dust myself off and hope that the next broom that comes by is being pushed by someone with a bit more integrity.